Thels Talk

“Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster and do it with no thought of reward. Your life will never be the same again,” wrote Og Mandino, the great inspirational thinker. In this age of blistering technological change where computers are obsolete the moment they come to market and business models that have governed commerce for decades have been rendered useless by the Web, one time-honored principle endures: (Italics) how high you will rise in business will ultimately come down to how well you treat people. The more prevalent technology becomes, the more prominent it will become to master the art of developing deep connections with the people who surround you.

You can transform the way you work and the results you see by making the simple decision to get back to the fundamentals and start focusing in building rich, mutually rewarding relationships with the men and women who are your teammates, customers and contacts. Sure high-tech communication tools save us time and make us more effective but these new forms of contact must (italics) compliment rather than replace the human touch and the process of cultivating relationships. Remember, technology is nice but you cannot fax a handshake and you can’t e-mail a pat on the back.

Here are 5 effective lessons to deepen your business relationships and, correspondingly, raise the levels of your success and fulfillment at work:
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SMILE: A curve that can set a lot of things straight!

MARRIAGE: It’s an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master

LECTURE: An art of transmitting Information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either

CONFERENCE: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present

COMPROMISE: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece

TEARS: The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water-power!

CONFERENCE ROOM: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on

OFFICE: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life

COMMITTEE: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together

OPPORTUNIST: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river

OPTIMIST: A person who while falling from EIFFEL TOWER says in midway “SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!”

Source

No one can see your passwords or whatever you ‘ re typing

No one can see whatever you ‘ re typing or which website you ‘ re surfing

We all know those cute little computer symbols called ‘emoticons,’ where:
*:) means a smile and
*:( is a frown.

Well, how about some ‘ BUTT ICONS?’ Here goes:

(_!_) a regular ass

(__!__) a fat ass

(!) a tight ass

(_*_) a sore ass!}

(_o_) an ass that’s been around

(_x_) kiss my ass

(_X_) leave my ass alone

(_zzz_) a tired ass

(_E=mc2_) a smart ass

(_$_) Money coming out of his ass

(_?_) Dumb Ass

These pictures were received by me in a forwarded email, upon search investigation I was able to locate the Source. Courtesy: Jennifer Maestre

Source

“The best engine in the world is the vagina !!It can be started with one finger, is self-lubricating, takes any size piston and changes its own oil every four weeks.

It is only a pity that the management system is so f****** temperamental !!”